#944 – Hate-tober
No, I haven’t join the ranks of the Westboro Baptist Church or any other organization that spews and supports hatred. I still firmly believe in Jesus’s call to love God and love others. However, I do have to get something off my chest.
I hate October.
For most of my life it seemed like October was just another month. Nothing incredibly special set it apart from any of the other 11 months. In recent years, though, people have celebrated October 1 like it was V-J Day. People count down to October and share their excitement through pumpkin, ghost and fall leaves emoji.
I’ve never really liked October but everyone else’s passionate love for the month has turned my dislike into hatred. Here are some of the reasons why I hate October.
- Southern California: I love everything about southern California and often ask Jesus to let me live here forever. However, southern California doesn’t really have anything that people love about October. It’s still 95 degrees outside, palm trees don’t have leaves to change color and we’re in the middle of a severe drought. A pumpkin spice latte loses some of its charm when the temperature outside is hotter than the drink in the cup.
- Pumpkin Spice: Speaking of pumpkin spice, who decided we needed pumpkin spice everything? I already have strong feelings about pumpkin pie and now those feelings are spilling over into October from November. Pumpkin spice has gone from a latte at Starbucks to a ubiquitous flavor and scent infesting every product available. At Target yesterday I saw pumpkin spice bagels, English muffins, coffee creamer and Oreos. Pumpkin spice was fine as a novelty at Starbucks but we don’t need hundreds of other ways to ingest it.
- Daylight Saving Time: While Daylight Saving Time may not end until November anymore, it does start getting darker much earlier in October. I hate when it gets dark early and not just because I want to play until the streetlights come on. I really feel the time change and get a little grumpier in the fall until the winter solstice. I may not always like the heat of the summer but I love the long days.
- Horror Movies: I love going to the movies but there isn’t single release this month that I want to see. I hate October movies; they’re just a bunch of horror schlock. I have no desire to go to the theater and see a found footage film of a demon doll killing an entire family. I also have no desire to go to the theater and see a room full of people tortured and killed by increasingly gruesome means. I’m glad I don’t have cable because then I’d be forced to see even more commercials for Annabelle.
- Halloween: The biggest reason I hate October is Halloween. As a kid I loved Halloween and when I have kids I will love Halloween with them. At this point in my life, though, I can’t stand Halloween. Adults have hijacked Halloween and turned it into another hedonistic holiday. For a lot of adults Halloween is just an excuse to wear too few clothes and drink too much alcohol. Halloween is the worst and I can’t wait until we can get on to real holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas.
Obviously God is good and grace abounds so there’s not too much to be upset about. If we are going to complain, though, then we should complain about October because it’s the worst. Thankfully we only have 29 more days to go until we get to November and can forget about October for another 11 months.
What do you hate about October?