#673 – Transformers 4

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The name and first poster for the next Transformers movie were released yesterday. The Autobots and Decepticons will square off next summer in Transformers: The Age of Extinction.

I was as excited as anyone for the original Transformers. I was actually at summer camp the week it came out and couldn’t wait to get home to see one of my childhood favorites brought to life on the big screen. Transformers wasn’t a great movie but it filled me with glee to see Optimus Prime taking on all comers.

The next two Transformers movies were even worse than the first and I don’t have much hope for the fourth installment, even if it does have the Dinobots.

Like the Transformers movies, here are some Bible characters who should have stopped when they were ahead.

Noah

Noah had a good thing going. God chose to rescue Noah and his family because Noah was the only righteous person left on the planet. Off the top of my head I can name at least 100 people more righteous than me but Noah was the most righteous person on Earth. Noah was also faithful and, in spite of the hard work and lack of something upon which to set sail, he built an ark and saved all of the animals (except for unicorns and Dinobots). Noah should have stopped while he was ahead, though. As soon as he landed, Noah planted a vineyard, got drunk and rolled around all naked. I suppose a year trapped on a boat would make a man do crazy things.

Saul

Israel wasn’t supposed to have a king; God was supposed to be their king. However, the Israelites wanted a king just like all of the other nations, in spite of God’s warnings that the king would conscript their sons and levy taxes against them. Israel’s first king was Saul, a great leader who looked the part and achieved success early in his reign. However, he should have stopped while he was ahead because he couldn’t parlay that early success into lasting success. Instead of establishing a long line of kings, Saul turned his back on God and his throne was given to David, making short guys everywhere proud.

Judas

Of every Bible character Judas really should have stopped when he was ahead. Even if he had stopped after stealing money from the disciples’ bank account, Judas would have still been better off. Judas was one of Jesus’s closest friends and on a mission to change the entire world. Now, instead of being remembered with the other 11 disciples, his name has become synonymous with betrayal and treachery. If someone calls you a Judas he or she probably doesn’t mean that you’re one of his or her 12 best friends.

The Transformers movies were never that far ahead to begin with, but they’ve definitely fallen behind with the two most recent installments. Hopefully Michael Bay can find some more of that nostalgic magic with Transformers: The Age of Extinction. And if he can’t find that magic again, hopefully he also managed to lose the racism of Skids and Mudflap.

What other Bible characters should have stopped when they were ahead?

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