#427 – Fantasy Football: X-Men Edition

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I love fantasy football.

This past weekend I had five drafts and only one of them has to be redone. I love trash talking with my friends, following my players and getting to know new people. The competition in fantasy football helps create a communal experience in which the participants always have something to talk about. Fantasy football is a great first step in getting to know someone; there’s no better icebreaker than talking about Drew Brees’ amazing performance or injury plagued running backs.

God wants us to live in community so I can only assume that God wants us to play fantasy football.

Drafting real life NFL players for a fantasy football team is great. But I thought it would be fun to look at some actual fantasy fantasy teams throughout the football season.

Let’s get started with an X-Men fantasy football team.

Quarterback – Cyclops

This would be the easiest position to draft for an X-Men fantasy football team. Cyclops is a natural leader and, in the more recent comics, has thrown off the shackles of Professor X and taken complete control of the X-Men. Cyclops has been trained to be a leader since his first days at Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters and that investment has paid off. That investment would also pay dividends on the football field as Cyclops could inspire his team, control the huddle and eventually lead his team to victory. His powers would also come in very handy; instead of taking a sack he could simply shoot an optic blast at any defensive end or linebacker who got too close.

Running Back – Wolverine

A lot of running backs are the shortest players on the field. Their short stature helps them keep a low center of gravity as they push their way through the pile, trying to get a few yards. Wolverine would be the ideal running back. He’s short. He’s strong. He would never have to worry about an injury. In spite of the terrible X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Wolverine is still the most popular X-Man. He’s an Avenger, he’s an X-Man and he still has time for his own personal adventures. Wolverine’s determination and tenacity are unparalleled; if it was 4th and inches with the game on the line, I know that Wolverine would be able to get those inches and then some. The only problem is that he’s Canadian so he might confuse some of the CFL’s rules with the NFL’s rules.

Wide Receiver – Nightcrawler

Wide receivers need to have speed. They are generally the fastest players on the field and are at their most successful when they can race down the sidelines beating the defense. I was going to pick Quicksilver but he was technically never an X-Man. Instead of Magneto’s son, I went with Nightcrawler. Nightcrawler may not be as fast as Quicksilver but he can teleport almost immediately from the line of scrimmage. He could also use his acrobatics and prehensile tail to battle defensive backs for the ball. Unfortunately Nightcrawler’s tail would count as part of his uniform, like long hair hanging out of the back of the helmet. Just yanking on that demon-elf tail could spoil too many plays.

Defense – Colossus

Colossus would give new meaning to the nickname “Steel Curtain”. Colossus wouldn’t be able play defense by himself but he might be able to play the defensive line on his own. Colossus is a great X-Man and really pushed boundaries with his first appearance in the midst of the Cold War. He really would dominate the war in the trenches, tossing aside offensive linemen in order to get to the quarterback. I don’t know if Colossus would ever be a fan favorite, though, due to his Ivan Drago vibe.

Fantasy football is great and I can’t wait to see how my teams do and how it helps me connect with others. I think a football team of X-Men would win the Super Bowl every year. I wouldn’t mind at all as long as they played for the Chicago Bears.

What other X-Men would be good for a fantasy fantasy football team?


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